


Wilder Nights at Home

by tomfoolery14



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Boys In Love, Communication, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-06
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-11-13 01:34:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18022298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomfoolery14/pseuds/tomfoolery14
Summary: The same feeling of longing simmering low in his stomach that he’d had when they trained together was back, but now for a different reason. This desire wasn’t driven as much by raw, hedonistic need but rather by the way he yearned for his body to feel like his own again. He’d been avoiding certain degrees of closeness in order to protect himself, to preserve the walls he had put up around himself, but after their discussion the other day, they’d begun to crumble. And he couldn’t lie to himself anymore about the fact that he missed the way they used to be together.sequel to the draw - 3x12 coda





	Wilder Nights at Home

**Author's Note:**

> here is the unplanned sequel to my little two part 3x12 coda based on the draw by bastille

“This feels a little derivative,” Magnus murmured against Alec’s lips, laughing when the force of Alec’s insistent kissing knocked him back into the stained glass window of his office.

All that separated him from being pressed against the holy visage of the angel Raziel was the fabric of his clothing. Blasphemy, some would say. Desecration. Irreverence _. I am worshipping at his feet_ , Magnus would tell them in his defense, _worshipping the body of my love—the product of Raziel’s glory and greatness._

“Derivative is good,” Alec managed to say breathlessly.

The upswing of resolution upon Clary’s return had put everyone in a lighter mood, which had led to an impromptu bout of heated kissing when Magnus came to get Alec for lunch. The details were hazy now in retrospect, muted by the miasma of heat that bloomed from the place where their bodies touched.

Hands sliding down Magnus’ lower back to grasp hungrily at his hipbones caused him to cant forward reflexively. The same feeling of longing simmering low in his stomach that he’d had when they trained together was back, but now for a different reason. This desire wasn’t driven as much by raw, hedonistic need but rather by the way he yearned for his body to feel like his own again. He’d been avoiding certain degrees of closeness in order to protect himself, to preserve the walls he had put up around himself, but after their discussion the other day, they’d begun to crumble. And he couldn’t lie to himself anymore about the fact that he missed the way they used to be together.

“Bedroom?” he asked Alec, tugging on his hair where his fingers were anchored.

“Suddenly you care about privacy?” Alec teased, kissing him in small, eager surges. “You were fine the other day, when you tried to get me naked in the training room.”

Putting a hand against his chest to push him back, Magnus looked at him. “I want you to take me to bed.”

Alec sobered at his tone of voice, looking at Magnus intently. “Yeah. Yeah, of course.”

They stumbled their way down the halls, occasionally stopping for a hungry kiss, punctuated by laughter, until they nearly fell through the doorway to Alec’s room.

Last time, Magnus had pushed Alec down onto the bed, crawling over his body slowly until neither of them could bear the teasing any longer. This time, he wanted something different—Magnus wanted more than just needy, dirty sex. This time felt different, _was_ different.

Alec moaned softly as Magnus’ hand trailed down the muscled planes of his abdomen reverently only to be followed by his mouth pressing sucking kisses.

Things were a little less hurried, a little less insistent. Magnus wasn’t looking to hurry through anything this time, wasn’t single-mindedly chasing pleasure and all the heights it could reach.

To be weighed down by emotions was an inherently human quality, and for a time Magnus hated that about himself, but to be capable of feeling with such depth could go in either direction. In trying to protect himself by closing off, he was depriving himself of what he needed the most. The two were mutually exclusive, and in order to let the good in, he had to be willing to take the gamble that the bad would come too.

In a flurry of clothing and appendages, they fell onto Alec’s bed side by side.

Alec’s hands on either side of Magnus’ neck were a comforting weight, and he reached up to hold them in gratitude. Their kissing had slowed as they settled into one another in a way they hadn’t in some time, and it felt like overwhelming relief cresting in Magnus’ chest. A soft sound escaped him, one that he didn’t quite understand.

Alec looked at him, eyes trusting and open. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” That was the one thing that Magnus would always know with absolute certainty; the one thing that was an underlying constant much like the beat of his own heart.

Wandering hands trailed across bare skin, and soon enough they had found a rhythm moving with each other in tandem. Soft moans and whispered words of love were the only sounds in the room, save for the rustling of sheets. They tumbled over the edge together as they climaxed, foreheads pressed together as they shared their breath.

Alec’s fingers slipped on sweat-glazed skin as he tightened his hold on Magnus’ back. “Can I hold you for a minute?”

It made Magnus’ heart ache to hear the trepidation in his tone. He knew he had been pushing Alec away, had seen the way it disappointed him before he forced it down, but it was even worse to know that after sharing such a vulnerable moment together he was still uncertain of where their boundaries lie.

“I’d like that,” he replied, smiling as Alec buried his face in his neck. The sensation of having languid, warm kisses pressed against that delicate skin made goosebumps rise on his arms. “Alexander?”

Alec hummed sleepily, shifting comfortably in Magnus’ arms.

“I’m sorry that I’ve been shutting you out.”   

Alec was quiet for a moment—inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. “I just want to be here for you, Magnus. I know that I can’t fix it, and that kills me, but I can be here for you, with you, if you’ll let me.”

Trailing his fingers down Alec’s spine, Magnus chose his words carefully. “I wasn’t trying to put up a wall between us, and I hope you can believe that. Talking about everything means that I have to acknowledge how terrible this feels, how deep inside of me this decay goes, and I don’t know if I’m quite ready to go there just yet. But I don’t want to hold you at arm’s length; I miss you when it feels like we’re so far from each other. I don’t want you to hurt too, but I think the only way to get past this is to go through. Together.”

Alec sat up slightly, looking into his eyes. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” He reached down for one of Magnus’ hands and placed it on his chest.

The feeling of Alec’s heart beating beneath his palm was like magic.

**Author's Note:**

> come find me on [tumblr](http://royaltybane.tumblr.com)


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